Thoughts are not facts!

“Your Thoughts Are Not Facts” – I believe this simple statement has the power to be transformative.

Every day, we experience thousands of thoughts — a constant inner commentary trying to make sense of the world around us. These thoughts are shaped by so many things: our upbringing, culture, social norms, past experiences, even our gender. Sometimes they offer helpful insights. But here’s the catch — they are not always accurate. Our thoughts are biased. They’re not objective truths.

Think about this: have you ever had an argument where both you and the other person were convinced you were right? It’s not necessarily that one of you was wrong. More often, it’s that you were seeing the same situation through different mental filters — your individual histories, emotions, and beliefs.

As a Clinical Psychologist with nearly 20 years’ experience, I’ve taught this concept to many people. But I’ll be honest — I didn’t always feel it in my bones for myself. Intellectually, I knew thoughts weren’t facts. But for years, I still accepted my inner narrator’s voice as truth.

Then, something shifted.
I had one of those moments where the penny drops — and I realised I didn’t have to buy into every story my mind was telling me. What a relief that was.

Sometimes our minds get stuck in “threat mode.” They zoom in on danger, criticism, or self-doubt. In those moments, it’s hard to access the calm, compassionate perspective that might offer a fuller picture.

But once we start noticing thoughts for what they are — just thoughts and not facts — we get more freedom. We create space to respond rather than react. We gain more choice.

This idea alone has been life-changing for many of my clients. And for me too.

If you find yourself caught in a cycle of unhelpful thinking, know that you’re not alone. Therapy can offer a safe place to explore these patterns and build a different relationship with yourself. If this resonates with you and you’d like to explore it further, please do reach out to me – I’d love to hear from you.

How to Find a Therapist

Finding a therapist can be a daunting task! With so many different therapists out there, it is hard to know where to begin. As a Clinical Psychologist I am often asked by friends, family and colleagues for my tips. I’ve summarised these below and I hope they are helpful as you embark on your search.

Knowing where to look.

Directories such as ‘psychology today’ and ‘counselling directory’ are a good starting place, however it is worth noting that not all psychologists or therapists are registered with these directories. A quick google search can highlight who might be working in your local area. The growing popularity and ease of video calls has meant that you can connect with psychologists and therapists nationwide. This is great, as the pool of people you can choose from is bigger than ever. However, online therapy is not for everyone, and some people would much prefer to be in a room with their therapist or psychologist. So, to begin with, I encourage people to think about whether they are happy with online therapy. If not and you’d prefer face to face sessions, sticking to those people working in your geographical area will be necessary.  It is also good to ask for recommendations. Chances are if people are recommended, they have been helpful in bringing about positive change for someone else!

Understanding the difference.

There are many different types of therapists and psychologists and understanding the difference is important. For example, some therapists are trained in just one therapy e.g. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), others might be trained in more than one. Clinical Psychologists are trained in several different therapies and the training is rigorous and doctorate level. Also, therapies differ in terms of the focus and structure of sessions as well as how helpful they are for certain diagnoses/conditions. Psychologists and therapists should be advertising which therapies they are trained in and use, so once you know this you can do a bit of research to find out exactly what that therapy might be like and therefore whether it would suit you.

Make sure that the professional you are looking into is appropriately trained and regulated.

The title, ‘Clinical Psychologist’, is a protected title as set out by the Health and Care Professions Council (HCPC); therefore, Clinical Psychologists must be registered with them to practice. The HCPC works as a regulator for the profession ensuring its members are appropriately trained and qualified and, in this sense, they act to protect the public. You can check the register on the HCPC website to ensure a Clinical Psychologist’s registration is up to date. There are several other protected titles for psychologists, and these can be found on the HCPC website. Other types of therapists have different requirements when it comes to regulation, so it is worth checking what these are and doing your checks accordingly. There is a helpful blog on the HCPC website which unpacks this a bit further Understanding the regulation of psychologists |. Knowing that your therapist or psychologist is appropriately qualified and regulated offers you some peace of mind around the legitimacy of their skills.

Are they a good fit for you?

Once you’ve ensured the psychologist or therapist you are looking into is appropriately trained and works in a way that you think would suit you, next tune into how you feel about and with them. This is someone who you want to feel comfortable opening up to, feel safe with and have confidence in. There is research to suggest that the quality of the relationship you have with your therapist is an important factor in making positive change. Therefore, having an introductory call can be a good way to gauge whether you think they are a good match for you.

Take a moment to congratulate yourself.

It is a deeply courageous act to face your struggles and suffering and take steps towards making positive changes.

Good luck with your search! If you want to connect with me about the possibility of 1-1 sessions I’d love to hear from you.